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Sometimes simply being around mothers who “get it” helps you feel more appreciated. So here are some Mother’s Day suggestions:

How would you like to celebrate Mother’s Day?

This article has been updated. It was first published on June 14, 2011.

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During the QA after arecent webinar, a listener asked mehow she mightget over "mom guilt." Before I could answer, a memory that had haunted me appeared once again: I was holding a bag of groceries I had just picked up with my younger daughter while waiting for my older daughter…

May 19, 2016

In "Get Your Life Back: Beyond Work-Life Balance"

Mother’s Day Reassurance and Tweaks

It’s funny how one thing leads to another. I had a conversation with a friend who reminded me that it’s important for women over 40 to include some strength training in their exercise routine. She recommended a great class in my neighborhood. During my first class, I ran into another…

April 30, 2014

In "Get Your Life Back: Beyond Work-Life Balance"

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“Pain is too strong a word.” This is the feedback several of my classmates gave me on a very early draft of what is now my first e-book, The Lighthouse Method: How Busy, Overloaded Moms Can Get Unstuck and Figure Out What To Do With Their Lives. (Itis now available…

January 21, 2015

In "Get Unstuck"

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When I worked at the Families and Work Institute, I regularly analyzed data from The National Study of the Changing Workforce. One…

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As a big fan of thinking small, I have written about baby steps in the past. In recent months, I have realized…

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A number of interesting articles about relationships appeared last week. Here are two very different ones that caught my attention, in case…

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I’ve been immersed in the topic of career-family conflict since 1993, when I decided to go to graduate school after a short…

Lucy

I would like to be given homemade crafts, a genuine hug and kiss, and a simple “thank you Mom for being my Mom” that’s all. However, I am met with disinterest (hubby says “you’re not my mom” and fails to understand he is teaching our teens how to treat me and their future spouses), questioning (did you send my mom something?), and resentment (by our teens whose bio Mom died when they were small and I am their adoptive mom who had cared for them the majority of their lives since 6 years old). I am infertile and have no birth kids, which also makes me sensitive, but no one cares… just keep working for us Lucy and we’ll keep treating you like crap. (I’m not even called Mom on special occasions.

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Lucy, thank you for being so candid about your situation. I’m afraid this sort of thing happens for moms in blended families and moms of teens. You seem to have a double-whammy and that’s really hard! While technically you are not a biological mother, you clearly are a mother. You have “mothered.” Since we can’t control how others feel or what they do, I would suggest the following:

Sometimes when we treat ourselves the way we should be treated, others follow suit. Not always, but sometimes. I hope this helps. If you’d like to talk about more specifics, try requesting a consultation.

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