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Sometimes simply being around mothers who “get it” helps you feel more appreciated. So here are some Mother’s Day suggestions:

How would you like to celebrate Mother’s Day?

This article has been updated. It was first published on June 14, 2011.

Why I Feed My Children Paste, or 5 Steps to Get Over Mom Guilt

During the QA after arecent webinar, a listener asked mehow she mightget over "mom guilt." Before I could answer, a memory that had haunted me appeared once again: I was holding a bag of groceries I had just picked up with my younger daughter while waiting for my older daughter…

May 19, 2016

In "Get Your Life Back: Beyond Work-Life Balance"

Mother’s Day Reassurance and Tweaks

It’s funny how one thing leads to another. I had a conversation with a friend who reminded me that it’s important for women over 40 to include some strength training in their exercise routine. She recommended a great class in my neighborhood. During my first class, I ran into another…

April 30, 2014

In "Get Your Life Back: Beyond Work-Life Balance"

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“Pain is too strong a word.” This is the feedback several of my classmates gave me on a very early draft of what is now my first e-book, The Lighthouse Method: How Busy, Overloaded Moms Can Get Unstuck and Figure Out What To Do With Their Lives. (Itis now available…

January 21, 2015

In "Get Unstuck"

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Lucy

I would like to be given homemade crafts, a genuine hug and kiss, and a simple “thank you Mom for being my Mom” that’s all. However, I am met with disinterest (hubby says “you’re not my mom” and fails to understand he is teaching our teens how to treat me and their future spouses), questioning (did you send my mom something?), and resentment (by our teens whose bio Mom died when they were small and I am their adoptive mom who had cared for them the majority of their lives since 6 years old). I am infertile and have no birth kids, which also makes me sensitive, but no one cares… just keep working for us Lucy and we’ll keep treating you like crap. (I’m not even called Mom on special occasions.

Stacy Post author

Lucy, thank you for being so candid about your situation. I’m afraid this sort of thing happens for moms in blended families and moms of teens. You seem to have a double-whammy and that’s really hard! While technically you are not a biological mother, you clearly are a mother. You have “mothered.” Since we can’t control how others feel or what they do, I would suggest the following:

Sometimes when we treat ourselves the way we should be treated, others follow suit. Not always, but sometimes. I hope this helps. If you’d like to talk about more specifics, try requesting a consultation.

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Research needs and requirements vary with each assignment, project or paper. Although there is no single "right" way to conduct research, certain methods and skills can make your research efforts more efficient and effective.

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State your topic idea as a question. For example, if you are interested in finding out about Title IX (Title Nine) and women athletes in college athletic programs, you might pose the question, "How did Title IX impact women athletes in college athletic programs?"

Identify the main concepts or keywords in your question. These are potential search terms. In this case they are "title ix," "women," "athletes," and "college athletic programs".

Before you commit to a specific topic for your research, do a scan to make sure that your topic isn't completely covered in another paper; at the same time ensure that there is enough information available to complete the project. This can be particularly important if you are planning on using data in your research. If in doubt, ask your professor.

If you are finding too much information and too many sources, narrow your topic. For example: "women and athletes and college and athletics".

Finding too little information may indicate that you need to broaden your topic by using a more general term or terms in your search.

Once you have identified the main topic and keywords for your research, find one or more sources of background information to read. These sources will help you understand the broader context of your research and tell you in general terms what is known about your topic. They will give you an idea of how much and what kind of information is available on a given topic.

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Exploit bibliographies: Often there are scholarly articles that give an overview of research in specific fields (a review of the literature). The sources cited in the bibliography are good starting points for further research.

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